Daves Top 10 Shoes of the 2000’s

After the all the (still ongoing) success of my Top Shoes From The 90’s list, I decided to come with a follow up. This time highlighting the following decade.

In the 2000’s — Nike was still dominating, but the competition was ample. Hip-Hop culture was still dictating how most of us dressed. Meaning: Baggy jeans, basketball shoes, and most likely a T-shirt. Shoes were a little bulkier due to the baggy jeans, but it all flowed together, somehow.

Without further ado, I present to you, my list of fire from the 2000’s:

 

10. Air Jordan ‘Cool Grey’

thsese

It’s rare when I actually want to buy a pair of J’s. But, when these came out I planned to do that very thing. Problem was, everyone else had the same plan. Needless to say, they were sold out, and ’til this day I never laced up a pair. On a funny side note, my boy Garry bought them when they came out, and put these shits in a glass case, never to be touched . The young dude way of making a focal point for the room.

 

9. Nike Air Huarache 2k4

nike-air-zoom-huarache-2k4-university-red

I liked these mostly because when I played 2k, I would throw these on players who could ball. The white, red and blue were the original pair, but something about making the majority of the shoe navy blue, gives it more of a classic look.

 

8. Nike Air Adjust/Modify

air-adjust

I actually had the Air Modify Forces, although I really wanted the Adjust. Nonetheless, I changed that damn strap every chance I got!

 

7. Nike Shox VC II 

vc-ii

Vince Carter actually had a series of Shox, but the second rendition were my favorites. They looked comfy, sleek, and to the point.

 

6.Adidas Crazy 8’s

s

Before Kobe left for Nike, he was stuntin’ in these joints. This was after he was dating Brandy….err escorting her to prom, so I believe these were around 2000. I’m not sure, but I don’t really give a damn either way. These are beautiful shoes. Adidas has yet to top these. The joints with the clear bottom is some of Adidas best work though.

crazy-clear

I just hope the guy who designed them got a promotion.

 

5. Nike Air Yeezy 

airyeezy2-women-shoes-001_enl

I liked them. These are a rare find now. And by find, I mean at a normal price. If you search  for these on Ebay, you’d close your computer. The prices are astronomical. I’ll stick to looking at them from afar.

air-up-there

 

4. Penny Foamposites

foam

Oh yeah! The shoes that started a trend that’s still going strong. This was the first pair of $200 shoes. Back then we thought Nike was out of there got damn minds, but as you know; $200 is normal now. These are also a staple amongst the sneaker head community.

foam-collect

 

3. retro Air Jordan 1’s

bb-js

These are sexy, no?

 

2. Reebok The Question

ai-questions

It had been a long time since Reebok came with it. Nobody had been checking for Reebok since the pump action Dee Brown shits. Then Iverson became the the Hood champ, stopped wearing Jordans, and it was on from there. He probably had one more fire signature shoe after this, then it was over for Reebok.

 

 

  1. Air Force 1

pick-1

Come on. I know you had a few pair of these. Which color(s). I hope Nike gave Nelly some stock, or free Air Force’s for life. That man had people wearing Air Force’s to church, work, and job interviews! People thought this was the most versatile shoe ever created. Simple, yet aesthetically pleasing. These shoes were definitely king of the 2000’s.

Thank you for checking out my list. I plan to make one more, dedicated to shoes Nike needs to give me one more crack at. Starring these beauties:

Until Next Time✌🏿

 

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The NBA’s Deadly 9 (Marksmen)

Ok, after watching the NBA Rising Stars & the 3-Point Shootout, I think I’ve finally arrived at Acceptance Avenue. The NBA is a shooters league now, and it’s Not my era anymore. Everyone (shit, feels like everyone) fires three’s like there is no tomorrow, and that’s what it’s going to be for the foreseeable future.

I still care about shot selection, and percentages, so good luck trying to make me waver on that.

I put together a list of NBA Marksmen, who not only knocks them down, but are among the most accurate:

Qualifications: 250 three attempts or better + accuracy (over 40%)

Otto Porter 

otto

Attempts: 254

Makes: 118

Percentage: 46.5%

 

Kyle Korver

kk

Attempts: 260

Makes: 117

Percentage: 45%

 

J.J. Redick

jj

Attempts: 330

Makes: 139

Percentage: 42.1%

 

Klay Thompson

klay
(Photo: Juan Medina, Reuters)

Attempts: 431

Makes: 182

Percentage: 42.2%

 

C.J. Miles

cj

 

 Attempts: 266

Makes: 111

Percentage: 41.7% 

 

Kyle Lowery

lowry
Photo: Tom Szczerbowski/USA Today Sports

Attempts: 444

Makes: 185

Percentage: 41.7%

 

Nick Young

swag-master

 

Attempts: 356

Makes: 147

Percentage: 41.3%

 

C.J. McCollum

ap_17022035809265-e1485052038575

 

Attempts: 336

Makes: 138

Percentage:  41.1%

 

Steph Curry

Stephen Curry

Attempts: 537

Makes: 220

Percentage: 41% 

 

 

 

 

Tareau’s Petty List of arguments 

We worry so much in life, right? Bills, health insurance, car notes, rent, mortgage, children, etc. Well it’s time for some dam comedy. Yes yours truly, the  MOST STRAIGHT, PETTIEST MAN aka PETTYKANG is here to help. So check this out. 

Who doesn’t love a good argument? Especially when you are either on the winning side, or watching from afar. I miss on TV AND movies in my day, seeing people get TOLD DA F#$% OFF. Here are some of my favorite arguments or people getting told off or checked. 

https://youtu.be/aoN01umawRM
Honorable Mention: Set it off. Luther tells off poor Kimberly Elise and is the worst boss to work for. It’s all good, he gets what’s coming to him, but this part had me in tears!

https://youtu.be/nBxvDJXBSVE
10. A Thin Line Between Love and Hate. Yes and yes. Lynn Whitfield was a different kind of crazy. Man she is scary. I love this scene. Lmfao how she was provoking mama though.

https://youtu.be/3zspHbAk4Og
9. Bebe’s Kids. I really could put the whole movie, but when she told he about her ashyiness, it was over with. And she Hella caught the lotion bottle too. 

https://youtu.be/vudUSoBp_2s
8. House Party 1. Man I miss Robin Harris. This was my favorite scene because he Hella checked dude who thought he was gonna get a free pass for saying that he was a Muslim. Hahahaha. 

https://youtu.be/UCKjY37qxsY
7. Lean on Me. So Mr. Clark thinks he’s the HNIC, HUH? 

https://youtu.be/sWyLHU4ZaN0
6. Lean on Me. The origin of HNIC

https://youtu.be/z33wa1v_Pfg
5. Lean on Me. So what we not gonna have is a militant Black man as an incumbent principal tryna check a sistah. No sir. 

https://youtu.be/LqPbEOKzzUA

4. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Now this is a lighter side of an argument but man RIP James Avery. I would have loved to see James Avery and James Earl Jones in a shouting match.

https://youtu.be/DZ9PXG56WgA
3. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Will’s  face as he was instigating though. Little tiny onions swimming in a sea of gravy. 

https://youtu.be/AW9pklBXqk4
2. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. When The Real Aunt Viv, took her earrings off though. 

Bonus!!!!!

 https://youtu.be/2ZnbmWSkO7Y 

The Temptations Movie. You tell em David Ruffin. Ain’t nobody checking for Otis’ punk ass.

https://youtu.be/67NWq0AUwpc
1. Poetic Justice. I would never argue Regina King. I’m petty but not dumb. Man she is so fine and good with these roles, right?

Well this was just a random list. What would yours be? Please comment below. I will add more in the near future, until then remember Pettiness is hereditary 😁😁😁😁😁😁😊


Tareau’s top 20 TV theme songs of all time.

Petty king has arrived and is fresh off of beating his coworkers in bowling. Ok truth time I won the 1st game and lost the 2nd game. Enough with that, time to be petty. Dave drops jewels on Funky Fresh Fridays, so I’m feeling left out. With regards to Married With Children, Fresh Prince, Family Matters, Amen, 227, Different World, The Cosby Show, What’s Happening, Good Times, I Living Color, Martin, Living Single, and a slew of others, I wanted to include these. So I present to you my favorite TV theme songs of all time. Let’s get it.

https://youtu.be/JR5zFiIxqSs (Click link)
20. Doug So don’t act like you didn’t like this great theme song. Doug with his cast of friends. Skeeter, Patty Mayonnaise, Mr. Dink, Roger and let’s remember hanging out at the Honker Burger.

https://youtu.be/ogMBLRHJYXU

19. Captain Planet. Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, Heart, Go planet. (Nobody wanted to be Mati because heart was lame) hahahaha. Whoopi Goldberg was Gaia. Remember Captain Planet’s evil doppelganger Captain Pollution. I loved how Kwame was the leader and he was from Africa.

https://youtu.be/GazE8PAL-DE
18. Cops. Ok yes I know, subliminally advertising and seeing them arrest a lot of Black people. Sigh* but that theme song though.

https://youtu.be/pH48FM-8P9I
17. Sister Sister Yes and yes. Wasn’t this show Hella good. Wholesome but edgy, funny but deep. Shout out to Jackeé with her big red carpet. Hahahaha. Roger was Marques Houston. Man they use to dog him. 

https://youtu.be/cTt05xDgzXs
16. Hanging With Mr. Cooper. Oakland very own Mark Curry was Dave’s hero. Oakland Pride was on full display on this. Great cast too. My favorite episode was the “Love match episode” 

https://youtu.be/PIh5tjgMV2k
15. Three’s Company. Man Jack Tripper had it made, right. Hella escapades and hijinks hahahahaha. What about how Mr. Furley was always shocked or upset. Hahahahhahaha. 

https://youtu.be/h-mi0r0LpXo
14. Cheers, is filmed on front of a live studio audience. Nobody ever got a DUI huh? “Woody give me a beer!” 

https://youtu.be/8vbnLYROCj8
13. Perfect Strangers. Man I miss this show. 

https://youtu.be/TbjPNP3c7Bs
12. Punky Brewster. Remember the doll though??

https://youtu.be/hSrXupUlA_Q
11. The Wonder Years. I love the narrative of Old Kevin narrating throughout the show. Remember his whiny ass girlfriend, Winnie? And his nerdy pal, Paul? 

https://youtu.be/cS_lD9_Ur3g
10. Ghostwriter. I had a crush on Gaby. This was the first time, I learned what a Bodega was. I always had a composite notebook. RALLY TO

https://youtu.be/gpH_PIqT-q8
9. That’s So Raven. “You can gaze into the future” Man Raven Symone had so much potential to be wifey. Sigh. This was my favorite Disney show. 

https://youtu.be/M9z9FcCRj3s
8. Muppet Babies. So tell me, why they never showed Nanny’s face? My favorite was animal, he reminds me of my oldest son Naszir now. Hahaha

https://youtu.be/LBIgXhiOpeQ
7. Magnum P.I. I mean just look at Tom Selleck’s prestigious mustache tho! 

https://youtu.be/I0F-IHwgC-Q
6. The People’s Court. Hahahahahahahahahaha. That beat tho?

https://youtu.be/23GrEhLUF_k

5. The Golden Girls. So we gonna act like Blanche and Dorothy wasn’t doing every man they saw? Hahahahahahahaha. 

https://youtu.be/sF7ZY3ycnUE
4. Step by Step. Man Cody was the homie, right? Didn’t you want to live with this family? 

https://youtu.be/GbfVmzF7N4g
3. Knight Rider. Man looking dreamy in the 80s was the business, right? Hahahahaaha. I still want this car though.

https://youtu.be/9BuSUH4vt_I
2. Out of this World. Man who wouldn’t want to freeze time? This show came on right before Mama’s Family. 

https://youtu.be/woJrjb91pW4

https://youtu.be/e-JHfXVlkik
1. Tie: Ducks Tales and Inspector Gadget. Enough explaining, just listen to these amazing theme songs. 

Top 10+1 Movies of the 90’s

Hello Ladies and Gents. I was on youtube watching all things 90’s this week. To be honest, I grew horribly tired of these first “100 days” coverage and need a break. What I did realize, was how great those times were.

“Remember those mu%^a F&%kin dances?” That movie didn’t make the list, but I will give you the movie I’m referencing at the end of this post.

Anyway, I have compiled a list of my favorite movies of the 90’s. Here it is……

 

#11 Soul Food

 

soul-food-clip

 Remember Ahmad, Teri, Kenny, Max, Miles, Bird,Lem and ummm…Faith? This movie reminded me of my family before the elder women started passing away. Man, where are the matriarch?!? To be clear, you have to be at least fifty AND act as such. I miss them and god willing, I will one day be a great elder.

Enough with that…

Two lessons learned from this movie were…. 1)sometimes, family members are going to be the first to teach you what being trifling is all about, but no matter what you stick together. 2) NEVER, I repeat…NEVER ask an old boyfriend to help your new boyfriend with anything!!! Leave that All of us ish to the sitcoms.

 

#10 Love Jones

 

lovejones

Who was your favorite character in this movie? Well, I loved both Darius and Nina. The best part of that movie was when he recited his poem, “A Blues For Nina”. Who wouldn’t fall for that sexy ish. I don’t know about giving it to him on the first date, but his rap was nice. What I did appreciate was her honesty with herself in figuring out if she was truly done with her ex. As I write this, I can’t help but chuckle because anyone who knows me, knows that I don’t give credit for anything that a person is suppose to do. Yet, I just did. Oh well, I’m sticking with it. Does the Petty King have an issue?

#9 Shawshank Redemption

 

shawshank

This movie showed me that sometimes good people go to prison. Meanwhile, the officials governed with making the prison an institution, sometimes belong behind the bars they have control of. This movie was my introduction to the criminal justice system and how it really works.

#8 Bad Boys

bad-boys-movie

 

Marcus and Mike Lowrey.  “You ever make love to a man… Do you want too?” I think that line was from a sequel, but who cares.. This is my list, with my rules…lol…

#7 The Mummy

 

mummy

When those big ass roaches (aka scarabs) started crawling under the the servant’s skin, I damn near died.

#6 Boys in the Hood

boyz-n-the-hood I don’t care how sophisticated you may be…Deep down inside, you can conjure up the attitude and the voice to rival, Regina King’s,”But do he got a girlfriend” and”He fine anyway… You better watch his ass, somebody might steal ’em.” This was the funniest ish ever. That facial expression though!!!!!

#5 A Thin Line

 

a-thin-line

Was this really the look of players back in the 90’s? All I can say is, Please come and get your 40-year old uncle who thinks he is still 26 and his even older “patnah”.

#4 Face Off

face-off

 

This movie made me want to be a plastic surgeon. To take someone’s face off and trade it with whomever… That is as good as printing your own money. In short, an FBI Agent trades places with his son’s killer in an attempt to get the location of a bomb that is suppose to go off in three days. Let’s just say that you don’t really know a person until you have, literally, lived their life…and they have lived yours.

#3 New Jack City

newjackcity

“Rock-a-bye- baby” and “Am I my brothers’ keeper?” Stereotypical business at its finest…

#2 Goodfellas

goodfellas

This is when we had rules. Where are the rules? “My wife and her damn asthma!!”

#1 The Five Heartbeats

the-five-heartbeats

If you’ve seen it, you already know why it’s number one. “Just in case” you haven’t .. no worries, “I got nothin’ but love for you baby.” Type those into youtube. Guaranteed, you’ll want to watch it tonight.

Answer to the movie quote in the intro: The Wood….Ya’ll wouldn’t know nothin’ about that, though:)

 

 

Tareau’s top 10 Afros of all time.

Yes Yes yes the most underrated hairstyle has came back in full force. I am jealous that I lost my hair so here’s 10 Afros that I’ve always admired

Honorable Mention: Me circa 2006. 

10. Snoop Dogg back in that day. 

9. Black Michael Jackson 

8. ?uestLove 

7. Ben Wallace

6. Dr. J.

5. Esperanza Spalding 

4. Diana Ross

3. Ike Turner 

2. Angela Davis

1. Hands down Bob Ross. Look at the whimsy in his eyes. That gleeful smile. Hahhahahaha. 

Tareau’s top 10 wrestling moves of all time

Ahhhhh yes. Nothing screams alpha male than watching a whole bunch of half naked, Steroid using, oiled up, men grapple and manhandle each other in a square ring, in front of thousands of people. 😂😂😂😂😂. Hahahahaha. Dam. Yea I said it. But WWF wrestling (WWE now) was really big to me when I was growing up. Watching superstars on Saturday morning at 10am, and being Hella scared when the Undertaker and Paul Bearer comes to the ring. Ahhhhh memories. Well here’s another top 10 list. This one is about my favorite finishing moves.

10. The Figure 4 leg lock

9. The F5 

8. Stone Cold Stunner

7. The Hurricarana 

6. The walls of Jericho 

5. The Rock Bottom 

4. The Dudley boys 3d through a table

3. The pedigree

Ok for the top 2, I’ve provided video footage. Watch at your own risk😲😨

https://youtu.be/bXYJnre1fgQ (Click Link)
2. Sweet Chin Music

1. Hardcore Holly’s text book dropkick. 

https://youtu.be/iOkTVg7Aa_g

Top 10 + 1 Shoe Wishlist 2017

If you know The Dave, then you know I have a thing for shoes. Runs in my blood. It’s not many things better than having a collection of shoes to choose from. I love to dress, and shoes are my domain! I put together a list of shoes I plan, or would love to get my hands on. Yes I take donations lol.

[Running/Training Shoes]

Running shoes are my favorite tier of shoe. Unless we are going somewhere important I probably have on a pair. I need the following:

NIKE AIR HUARACHE ULTRA

Screen Shot 2017-01-01 at 11.36.33 PM.png

I remember being told a long time ago, that the Huarache is one of the most comfortable shoes ever assembled. I’ve only tried on a pair, but this color way will assure I finally purchase a pair.

Retail Price: $120

NIKE AIR MAX 90 ULTRA ESSENTIAL

Screen Shot 2017-01-01 at 11.44.43 PM.png

Benefits via nike.com:

  • Breathable mesh upper with synthetic leather overlays for enhanced support
  • Injected unitsole midsole/outsole for cushioning, durability and minimal weight
  • Visible Nike Max Air heel unit for lightweight impact protection
  • Rubber outsole for durability and traction

What The Dave Thinks: Just look at them! Air Max 90’s are the best shoes in American history. Comfy as well

Retail Price: $120

PACKER SHOES x ADIDAS NMD PRIMEKNIT

packer-shoes-adidas-nmd-r1-primeknit-1-681x478

 

packer-duece

☝🏾☝🏾 These are sexy no?

East Coast shoe store, Packer Shoes has teamed up with Adidas to release their own: Packer Shoes x adidas NMD Primeknit collaboration. Using a classic color palette that was a prominent fixture in much of the brand’s ’80s and ’90s sportswear output.

Retail Price: $180

Adidas NMD XR1 Triple Black

adidas-nmd

If a picture says a thousand words, should I not say another peep?

Well, I like to talk. Plus these shoes are a bit of a mystery. I’ve scoured the internet profusely, and believe it or not it’s hard to get a consistent price on these. It’s mostly people charging an arm and a leg on Ebay, among other sites. But I like these, and other pictures, including ones on other people’s feet, are just as attractive as they are standing alone above.

$ Depends

 

[Basketball Shoes]

When I was a young lad, all I ever wore were hoop shoes. With age you tend to outgrow or graduate your taste in…everything. But there are two pair of shoes that have caught my eye that I’m considering. They are as follows:

 

Air Jordan 4 Motorsport

air-jordan-4-421-630x368

I maybe owned 2 pair of J’s in my life. Never really cared for them. They represented a followers mentality, searching for significance. These pair may be the first pair in well over a decade that gave me the urge to buy. Meh, we’ll see.

Retail Price: $190

 

 

Nike Kobe XI Elite 

Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 12.25.00 AM.png

I’ve never in my life purchased a pair of Kobe’s, but these are fly. Something about them. Sort of stealth like. Maybe it’s the clear bottom or the upper mesh, either way thievery well could end up being the only hoop shoes in my closet.

Retail Price: $200

 

[Casual]

Asics ONITSUKA TIGER MEXICO 66 – MEN’S

Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 9.55.38 AM.png

 

Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 9.57.34 AM.png

I have a soft spot for casual shoes. I also have an affinity for Asics. Any low tops w/ a gum bottom gets a second look from me. These are versatile, and there are so many color ways to choose from. I need help picking. See the other colors here

Retail Price: $75

 

[Grown Men Shoes]

If you didn’t know, The Dave has reached official grown ass man age. I turn 35 in 17 days. Embrace it right? Right. So i’m finding shoe’s like the ones below, really have my attention. Funny how age and maturity mix, and change your thinking patterns. In my 20’s I hadn’t noticed this style of shoe. Not once. Now I want a closet full. Anyhow, I have no spill for the magnificence below, I’ll just let you bask in the glory that is the future of my closet.

 

Gucci Leather perforated lace-up shoe

Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 10.26.47 AM.png
Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 10.26.29 AM.png
$950

LONG BRANCH WINGTIP BOOTS

wingtip-boots-red-strings

$350

 

 

 

Alden Alpine Wingtip Boot 

alden-shoe$ Sold Out

 

 

 

FRANCESCHETTI

Leather & Tweed Wingtip Boots

Screen Shot 2017-01-02 at 5.43.24 PM.png

Retail Price: $550

 

Hope you enjoyed my list. More to come. And if anyone has suggestions on shoes, or want to talk shoes, you know where to find me.

Tareau’s top 10 greasiest looking brothas of all time

King Petty AlertThats rightI am some ish on this oneso as a disclaimerif

youre not ready please leaveWe talkin on this oneOhhhhhh YesLot of slang so keep up with me people.
Greasy, Glistening, Sparkly, Shiny, Slick, Conniving, Dirty, Grimy, etc. You see people these gents take the cake. Just looking “guilty”or looking like “you did it” is enough for me to charge you with excessive greasiness. People who fit this criteria don’t know that they are greasy. Hell you might actually be one of them. Hahaha. There’s a few people I left off like Bobby Brown, Easy E, Teddy Riley Kirk Franklin,etc. Greasiness don’t necessarily mean that you’re a bad person. You can just look greasy. Greasiness can be hereditary and it is curable by soaking in a tub full of dawn while washing your draws. Hahahaha. All in jokes folks and you know us black people love to clown. So here’s my list.

10. Rappin 4-Tay

Rappin 4-Tay looks like the kind of cat to steal some money from you, right before he asks you for a dollar. Just Trifilin’ looking y’all. Hide ya wallets.


9. Lionel Richie

Oh Lionel, Ya High Yella Ass is not exempt. You can try and swoon all the ladies but I see through you. So you can take your sly greasiness and go somewhere.

8. Jesse Jackson Sr.

Yea you pug looking, not catching Martin Luther Da Kang Jr, Stealing money from black folks, Conniving, fake ass Mike Epps looking ass. Ohhhh Jesse Jackson is sholl Greasy. He looks like he would give your wife a hug and steal her pearls at the same time. In the words of Cedric the Entertainer in Barbershop “Man F*&$% Jesse Jackson.


7. Bootsy Collins

Yes I’m hating on you Bootsy, you an alright brotha but you look mighty shiny. Hell No you can’t borrow my pillowcase nor a spare toothbrush.

6. Phil Lewis aka TC from the Wayans Bros.
Oh yes, TC was the Grimiest cat in TV history. With his gold teeth and his experienced polyester blends, this cat would flat out sell you your own kids just to ask for child support. Watch out for TC y’all. Looking like he can’t be near an open flame. Hahaha.


5. Clifton Powell aka PINKY NUCCA

Yaaaasssss (I see you Lady G) Pinky is the ultimate hustler. To bad he didn’t take some strides or oxygen pads to that forehead before he decided to leave the house. Ohhhhhh he is Grimy looking. I’m talking bout peeing in the kiddie pool Grimy. Say anotha word Nucca!!


4. David Ruffin

David Ruffin is greasy for so many reasons. Drugs and domestic violence aside, David Ruffin telling the Temptations that they ain’t sh#t without David Ruffin is the most classic line of all time. He looks like he would steal all ya mama’s hair products in the middle of the night, with rollers in his hair still.


3. Ron Isley

OHHH Ron Isley watched R. Kelly pee on that girl, yall know he did. King Swindle at his finest. With his tax evading, hot comb using, fake preacher having self. Just Trifilin. Man stay away from him. Lmfao Mr. Big is gonna find you.


2. Rick James

Any cat with a cigarette hanging out they mouth fits the above criteria. We all know Rick’s antics so we will just skip to #1.


#1. Jermaine Jackson 

No one will ever out Glisten Jermaine. He takes greasy to the moon with his clay like, molded, tickle me Elmo sweater wearing, not showering but just spraying on some brut, having ass. Yes he needs to be power washed, chisled with a jack hammer and rubbed down in some downy dryer sheets  Just greasy. You can just smell his leathery, botox, fake plastic self from this side of the smartphone. Y’all better not be looking at this with A Galaxy Note 7 because u just might blow up. Hahahahhaahahahahah

So there you have it folks. Tune in next time for the Grimiest ladies of all time. Ohhhhhh huh Who will make the list

Tareau’s Top 10 jerseys in NBA History

The Couch Sports

Yes. Yes. And yes again. Every die hard sports fan has a favorite jersey. Whether it’s a classic throwback, an every so often alternate, the same classic jersey with updated graphics and coloring, or even if it’s just a rival team who’s jersey you’ve grown accustom to over the years. I’m no different in the sense of a die hard sports fan. So here’s my crappie list. Keep in mind this is my list. Get your own dam unis. Ha ha ha

bran

10. The 95/96 Forest green Milwaukee  Bucks alternate away Jerseys. Awww yes. These were retired in the 98/99 season. I used to love seeing Ray Allen, Glenn Robinson and Sam Cassell wearing these jerseys every so often. Hell even Tim Thomas and Darvin Ham too.

malone

9. The 96/97 Utah Jazz away unis. These were a nice shade of purple with the mountain in the background. Utah had success…

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